I wandered around in a fit of worry
Wringing my hands
Sighing and moaning
Swiped my fingertips across my forehead
This doesn’t make sense
How can it be?
There’s no explanation
It couldn’t work out
I see no viable ending
Does he really know me?
We’re too far apart
What does he see?
And on and on and on and on
Excuses, pushes, denial
Trembling, I dialed his number
“It would never work,”
“This doesn’t even make sense….”
Line silent in pregnant pause
Words then tumbled from my lips
One upon another in a jumble
Pouring out, piling around his feet
“We’ve only just met…
I’m no good…
You realize I destroy what I touch?
“What if, what if, what if, what if…?
I’m not what you think I am…
What do you even see in me?
I’ve been hurt before….
“Please say something….”
I could hear him
Pushing the words away with his toe
A match striking
Flames crackling, excuses burning
My phone pinged with a text
Pulling it from my ear, I saw there
The image he had sent
And in a moment of clarity I realized
I had been thinking about this all wrong
Thinking, thinking, overthinking
Love wasn’t a head thing
It was conceived within the heart
And there it grew
And I would spend my whole life
©️tara caribou – 2018
You can read more about overthinking love and relationships at Caribou Crossings.